Spanking and the Size of the Scar

I heard today from a reader who feels that the anti-spanking contingent (hysteria) is marginalizing and eclipsing the horrors of the sexual abuse of children or “real abuse” of children.

I have heard this argument before…and it brings to mind several things…

…memories of hearing my Uncle roar at male cousins who were crying about something, that if they didn’t stop crying, he would come in there and really give them something to cry about. One time the crying did not stop and he took his belt off.  The sound of the buckle clanking blended with muffled sobs  as he approached  my cousin’s door. I stood frozen with fear. Loud smacking and screaming sounds followed.   I ran home.

The oppressive nature of corporal punishment, or the threat of it, is also real abuse. Brutality.

Threats and fear leave a different kind of mark, but a mark nevertheless.

I was moved and amused at the scene below deck in the movie Jaws- where men shared their scar stories… and the biggest ugliest scar was of course a triumph of horror…however it did not have the power to erase any of the other scars.

The scars exist no matter where they reside, or what the size or scope or story may be.

Scars are carried with us  forever. Sometimes the stories can change the nature of the scar, if the stories are about change… perhaps about how spanking and beating was stopped and empathy was born.

mother and son

mother and son


About cthebean

Educator, musician, social justice activist...and now a blogger. Children deserve unflinching support from adults.....they deserve nothing less. All kids . Everybody's kids. Everywhere.
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2 Responses to Spanking and the Size of the Scar

  1. Spanking not only causes brain damage in children (reducing the amount of ‘grey matter’ in the brain,) it is also sexually abusive. The buttocks are an erogenous zone, a private sexual part of children’s bodies, striking the buttocks sends rushes of blood to the genitals, and many children are so imprinted by this trauma that they develop a sexual fetish for corporal punishment in later life. Spanking is also a gateway for many adults to get away with sexual abuse, since when you teach a child to accept (and that it is their fault) having their underwear taken off for this torture, it’s only one step away all kinds of molestation. So really, children should be protected from all kinds of abuse.

    Liked by 1 person

    • cthebean says:

      Thanks for adding to the collective wisdom on the damaging effects of spanking. Let’s hope we can get more people to understand the significant harm that is done to young people by this society wide child rearing practice.

      Sent from my iPad



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